To Gain Self-Confidence
“Because one believes in oneself, one doesn’t try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn’t need others’ approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her.”
― Lao Tzu
Everyone can use a little more or a LOT more confidence. It’s actually a scarcity of self-confidence that can cause your life to be tossed and turned around by the challenges and distractions of the day. The fear of rejection can stop us in our tracks and keep us from moving in the right direction. The need for love, belonging, and acceptance becomes stronger than the inner compass within you that says this other decision or direction would really be better for me.
Maybe you’ve never been so unsure of yourself. If that’s the case, then awesome! However most of us don’t have the guts to do every intimidating thing every time without any fear at all. You may relate more to the feeling of needing to do something important but feeling panic-stricken to start. This not only limits your potential in life; it also minimizes your ability to create a positive impact on the world around you. You can gain confidence over your emotions, even during stressful times.
Here are some helpful tips to feel in control and confident:
1. Stop comparing yourself to others. As Theodore Roosevelt once said,”Comparison is the thief of joy.” The tendency to compare yourself to others is as human as any other feeling. However it’s a choice that possibly makes you feel less than someone else. We are not all on the same journey and your 10 steps back may later take you 100 steps forward into the life you desire. Appreciate more of what you already have, what you already do and who you’ve already become. Be inspired and motivated by others. Only compare your old self to the better version of you.
2. Realize that your uniqueness is beautiful (and embrace it). You’re the only you in this world. You’ll derail your confidence and your progress by humiliating yourself for your individuality. Stop wasting time and energy by struggling to fit in.
3. Think and act positively. Digging into positive thinking is a habit that must be formed. Negative emotions are powerful ways and they shut your mind off to opportunities and new ideas. When something negative happens or you find yourself in a trying situation, find the positives. You might have to search wide and deep but it will improve you emotional state and move you in the right direction. Positivity encourages you to plan ahead and think about actions you want that will bring you joy.
4. Look at failure as a learning opportunity. In fact, don’t even call it a failure. As long as you are alive, you have an opportunity for change, an opportunity for a do-over, a chance to get it right and to get the results you want. Learn to single out the event from your individuality and personality. Review the situation objectively and strive to take different approaches next time. Analyze what went wrong and what you can do to correct it.
5. “The best way to help yourself, is through helping others.” Proactively seek out opportunities to give back and help others in need. You will benefit tremendously. You will have a sense of gratitude. Your heart will fill with joy once you see the difference you are making. You’ll appreciate what you have in your life. You will have a more positive perspective which could turn into the catalyst which motivates you to move forward more quickly. You start to feel more fulfilled, more complete, more alive.
6. Accept your weaknesses. This can be your great leap towards personal growth. We all have flaws, weaknesses, and quirks. Look into them with compassion and understanding. You will understand the worth of really getting up close and personal with your shortcomings and then you turn to yourself in the mirror and say, “I love you anyway, no matter what.” There is always room for improvement. If your “weakness” is a hindrance, find a way to improve. There are tons of resources out there to help you move forward and stronger in an area. If you are looking for a way to reach your goals, increase your confidence and know the techniques to winning you can check out my course at Welcome to Your Greatness Course.
7. Begin making a life goal a reality. When you start to put energy into your meaningful goal (and you may have many more than one) you will feel a sense of purpose and peace. The emotions you attach to the things you plan to accomplish are your greatest source of motivation and energy. Your goal gives you focus, permits you to measure your progress, keeps you disciplined and most significantly brings you closer to being your best self!